The crystal method – the grid
S.p.o.c.k. – astro girl
Apoptygma berzerk – moan
Kmfdm – anarchy
The cruxshadows – marilyn my bitterness
Jon the dentist with dead can dance – novacane
Fictional – opportunities
Bloodhound gang with eiffel 65 – bad tounch
Placebo – pure morning
David bowie – hearts fiflthy lesson
Delerium – silence rmx
Vnv nation – homeward
Infected mushroom – becoming insane


this was just weird.

today my twitter, facebook and phone where blowing up asking if i was at the box last night because a lot of people kept seeing me there. they would see me and then blink and i would be gone when they were trying to come up to me and talk to me.

to be totally clear, i was not at the box last night. i was at home trying to calm down from yesterday and to do some more house hunting.

i had wanted to go and was offered a ride from a very sweet furry, but i really didn’t want to dress up or even try to be sexy. i was happy to be at home.

be the phantom version of me wasn’t the strangest thing that was going on there last night. i heard of a few sightings of sean….. and if you don’t know who sean is/was to the box, you really should know if you go. sean founded the box way back when. he was a very dear and sweet man. he would joke with me that he would switch teams for someone that looked the way that i do. i really cared about him. and he passed about five/six years ago to leukemia. i remember when one of my exs called me to tell me when he passed. (an ex that i am still very very close to and still hang out with and talk to a lot). i went to his wake that night and then the funeral.

he introduced me to a lot of the classic goth music that i had missed when i was first started djing goth and industrial and moving away from punk. there is some songs that have and always will make me think of him.

yes, there was a lot of people that hated him for a number of reasons, but he was a good man.

two phantoms in the club…. odd….

but it got me thinking about a few things and for me to act on a few things.

thank you for everything sean/gobo

How to

Some people think that oral sex is something that is a natural thing and that people instinctively know how to do it.  That is far from the truth.  We all have to learn how to do it at some point.  

He Guide To Going Down by Yvonne K. Fulbright, Ph.D is that how to book for women and men that want to learn a bit more about how to perform oral on a male lover.  

It has a very good overview of all kinds of sex tips to use.  Anything from the anatomy of a dick and what parts of more sensitive and the why those parts are more sensitive.  It also talks about different kinds of techniques (some that even I hadn’t heard of before.)  They even go over different ways of breathing and how to keep your jaw from locking up while doing it.

The only major problem is that it is very much being written for women to read.  But we all know that men do need this book as well and it would be nice if it would talk to them as well. 

1/22/13 Nox


Alabama 3 – 2129
Chumbawamba – if it is to be, it is up to me
A-ah – the sun always shines on tv
Spray – i am gothic
Clan of xymox – this world
Apoptygma berzerk – suffer in silence
Cosmicity – pure imahination
Depeche mode – sea of sin rmx
The sisters of mercy – this corrosion
Teddy thompson – the future
Emilie autumn – the art of suicide
Duran duran – the chauffeur
Nick cave and the bad seeds – red right hand dj neshamah rmx
Blank and jones with robert smith – a forest
Blur vs the prodigy – song 2/ smack my bitch up
My life with the thrill kill kult – kooler than jesus rmx

19 years ago, tonight, i had my first dj gig. it was punk music. now, i have been a dj longer than some of the club goers. scary thought. yes, my style has changed and i have had the chance to work with and learn from some of the most amazing djs in the area from all styles of music (even ones that you would never have thought i would be learning). still going and still going strong.

jocks vs. geeks: or fandom vs. fandom.

we all remember in high school where the jocks would pick on or even beat up on the geeky kids.  and we all know who each side was back in those days.  and it makes no difference where you landed back then because this has to do with what happened to both sides once they hit adulthood.


i was a geek.  i watched star trek and looked like i walked out of bladerunner (i still do to be honest).  i didn’t like sports.  i swam and that was the only thing that i was good at.  i hated watching sports at the time too.  


back then, football was just two teams.  one team ran one way.  the other team ran the other way.  there was a ball.  and they would all fall down.  i just didn’t care at all about any kind of sports.


but once we hit adulthood, for most of us, we stay true to if we are a geek or a jock/sports fan.  yes, we do cross into the other a lot once we get older.  but we do say fans of what we are fans of.  


but something occurred to me today.  


i went to a huge 49’s game party today.  i went with my hubby because he works for a sports talk radio station that was throwing the party.  everyone he works with knows that he and i are both totally geeks, but my husband does like a few sports.  and even i do like some of them now.


but those sports fans/jocks are really no less geeky about their love than we are.  they get exited when there is something going on their chosen team.  just like how i am when there is a new episode of doctor who or sherlock comes out.  they hoop and holler when they go out to watch in public, just like i did when i went to the avengers.  


hell, they even have a version of dungeons and dragons.  that would be fantasy football.  it’s very close to the same thing, just without the actual dungeons and the dragons. 


but for some reason, the sports fan/jock is seen by society as a more mature kind of passion than the geeky end of fandoms.


it’s that same fanaticism.  it’s the same passion.  it’s the same wild love.  


is it really all that different?




The deftones – hole in the earth rmx
David bowie – heart’s filthy leason
Mesh – it scares me rmx
Apoptygma berzerk – fade to black
Die krupps – to the hilt
Stromkern – stand up
Real life – oblivion
The dark clan – real vampires don’t sparkle (but they do wear white and dance rmx)
Helium vola – omnis mundi creatura
Placebo – pure morning
Smp – the knife
The strand – mama said knock you out!
Informatik – things to come
Screaming mad george – stigmata martyr
Zeromancer – send me an angel



Bt – dreaming
Cirque du soleil – alegria
Chumbawamba – salt fare north sea
Vnv nation – homeward
Crystal castles with robert smith – not in love
Muse – undisclosed desires
Civil twilight – letters from the sky
Dead can dance – the ubiquious mr lovegrove
Concrete blonde – bloodletting
Switchblade symphony – wallflower
Oingo boingo – dead man’s party


I have been expanding the collection of sex books for my house.  It’s something that such a mixed group could use.  

I picked up the book Red Hot Touch: A Head-To-Toe Handbook for Mind-Blowing Orgasms to add to the library.  Jaiya and Jon Hanauer put out this book in 2008 and it is 195 pages long.  

It is very much for at women and for straight women more than anything.  It covers anything from exercise that are for the hands and mouth to do all kinds of play with a cock.  There is tons of how to that most straight or straight-ish women know how to do.  There is nothing that this kind of women knows how to do with just a little talking to their male lovers.

The language is very simple, but it doesn’t talk down to the reader at all.  It is very welcoming and easy to follow.

But there is nothing that is really that innovative here at all.

Not really worth the money for the book or the fight to find it at 


1/1/13 playlist


Front line assembly with tiffany – new years day
Heaven 17 – let me go
The cure – why can’t i be you? Rmx
Eurythmics – i need a man
Wang chung – dance hall days
Berlin – sex
Pierre henri – psyche rock
Kraftwerk – the model
Stereo mc’s – connected
Information society – what’s on your mind? (pure energy)
Fine young cannibals – she drives me crazy rmx
Inxs – don’t lose your head
The cult – she sells sanctuary
Public image limited – rise